Inspired or Ill-Advised: 4 Sensible Edits to Blog Posts

Editing can be a bitter pill to swallow for many creative types. Even with work for clients, like blogging for a company. Writing is fun, and it’s even more fun when I get carried away with it. When I trim to fit what I’m writing to what the client wants, some of the weirder shit is inevitably cut or kept to match the brand.


Sometimes I wonder about those tasty brain nuggets. Where do they go? Some might find their way into a story, but many don’t. Starting today, those will have a home here.

 
 
In an outline for politically-focused speculative fiction:
 
Struggling to keep up, boomers fizzled out of the political scene with a whimper once the new system took hold. Their 20th century thinking and values were so behind the times it was almost comical to watch them try and hold the beast at bay. In the end they surrendered to an ideological future moving at a pace they couldn’t compete with.  The values of equality they championed and abandoned finally realized, not because of them but in spite of them.
 
 
In an article about methods of junk removal:
 
Trick Goblins Into Taking It


Goblin logic is absurd, there’s no arguing that. But that doesn’t mean you can’t take advantage of it. Find one and catch it in a bag. If it can’t answer your riddle, it grants you a wish. Poof! Junk is gone.


Of course, a better wish is probably some money for junk removal. Might as well make it a lot of money. Or wish for massive environmental repair and nip this thing in the bud. That may be outside a goblin’s power, but there’s not a lot of overlap in climate change and goblin research so it’s difficult to be sure.
“Be the goblin change you wish to see in the world.”
 
In an article on hypnosis:
 
In the bottom of your imagination, you could feasibly create any combination of genitals and terror that your mind can comprehend.
Of course, anybody telling you very seriously that they can control your mind isn’t necessarily in full control of their own.
 
 
In an article about moving on Earth Day:
 
We get a day off work to honor Christopher Columbus or Queen Victoria. That’s the person who still called Native Americans “Indians” even after he knew he wasn’t in India, and a person who was actually kind of awesome but was, let’s be honest, arbitrarily declared the ruler of other people for no good reason. But we don’t get the day off for the place where literally every person ever was born.
Almost literally.

Or actually literally, or whatever that word means to you now.

Although you could just be trying to get your money’s worth out of that couple’s discount on the costume rental.

 

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